"In vacant or in pensive mood..." I am: Bekah; 24; Law Student / Favorite Things: Carbs (so there!), Johnny Damon, Smiling at babies, Grilled cheese, Comfortable silence / Favorite Supreme Court Justice: Brennan / Favorite Wilson: Owen by an inch / Today's Special: Song: Elliott Smith, "Bled White"; Quote: "You know, there's like a butt-load of gangs at this school. This one gang kept wanting me to join because I'm pretty good with a bowstaff." Please love me: mmbekah@yahoo.com


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We Can Do It! (If By “It,” You Mean Laundry!)

No matter how much progress women make in society (my law school class, for instance, has more women than men), leave it to television to consistently throw us right back into the 1950’s. Commercials are the single most detrimental force against feminism. They continuously perpetuate stereotypical views about both women and men, and hinder any attempts to achieve an equal society. I’ve absolutely, completely, and totally had it. There are some basic themes running through commercials today that I just have to address.

1. Shaving. Yes, as one would deduce from commercials on the subject, the act of picking up a can of shaving cream, applying it to one’s legs, and using a sharp object to shave said legs is clearly beyond the realm of women’s capability. (Cut to a shot of a woman in a bathtub spraying herself in the face with some unruly shaving cream. You can just imagine the caption: “Oh, it comes out of this end! Now I get it!”). Because of the difficulties associated with shaving, one of the newest razors on the market seems to be much easier for women to “grasp.” It even has a no-slip handle. Essentially, this razor purports to have built-in shaving cream. But it’s not really shaving cream; it’s just goo. As my friend Melissa so aptly put it, the problem with shaving without real shaving cream is that “you can’t tell where you’re going or where you’ve been.” I think I’ll stick with the challenging, but ultimately more effective, two-step process.

2. Childcare. There are a bunch of JC Penny commercials going around that make me absolutely livid. They feature assorted doltish Dads attempting to perform strange, alien feats such as dressing and feeding their children. Those little brats just won’t behave, and the exasperated fathers exclaim, “Where is your mother?” Oh you guessed it folks, she’s at Penny’s shopping up a storm. I find these commercials offensive to both men (is feeding a kid peas really that gender-specific an undertaking?) and women. If the makers of that commercial wanted to answer the husband’s question realistically, I think they’d be better off showing mom hard at work at a job where she works harder and more efficiently than all the men but still gets paid less. Or maybe she’s having an affair because her tool of a husband can’t even get their kid ready for little league.

3. Laundry. Yes, you guessed it, “Mama’s got the magic of Clorox bleach.” I’m sure women around the country really appreciate that. In addition to their full time jobs and exhausting attempts at mastering the art of shaving, it’s good to know that women are still the only sex with enough time to do laundry. I have a news flash for my future husband: I don’t know how to iron, and I don’t intend to learn any time soon, so you better figure it out. Also, when we get married, whoever has the dirtiest clothes is doing the laundry. Enjoy that flag football game, k? I’ll be at work.

4. Beer. For a long time, I really liked the beer commercials featuring different groups of guys hanging around telling stories about funny stuff that happened to them. Like the one where the guy hitches a ride in an Eighteen wheeler in which there’s a ventriloquist dummy maniacally screeching “Eeeeeeeeee!” for the duration of the ride. The guy explains how he jumped out of the moving truck, and then everyone in the bar laughs. That’s funny. But then the commercial people tried to do a “women’s version” which consisted of a group of “girlfriends” sitting around coming up with original ways to get back at an evil ex-boyfriend, such as hitting him in the balls with a golf club. Ooh, good one! (Or not). The moral of the story: girls have nothing better to talk about than evil ex-boyfriends, and they’re not creative or funny either. Cool.

5. Cooking. “Choosy moms choose Jif.” Choosier moms choose a partner who’ll help shop for peanut butter once in a while.

posted by Bekah at 9:31 AM :: |